talk about it.

Sexual abuse and assault are an epidemic.   With at least 1 in three women and 1 in 6 men experiencing sexual assault/abuse before their 18th birthday and many more victimized or re-victimized in their adult lives, it is safe to say that this has happened to you or someone you know.  Despite the huge numbers of victims and perpetrators, sexual violence is almost completely silent.   Unlike other national crises such as cancer, unemployment, lack of health insurance, and war, talk of sexual violence is virtually nonexistent in political, educational, or personal speech.  NO national political figure has taken a stand on what to do to combat these crimes against kids and adults.   In our schools, kids do not feel safe or have the educational tools to know how to tell on their perpetrator.  Even in the majority of our personal lives, most of us don’t talk about it.

The time to talk is now. For those of us that are survivors, talking and sharing our stories may seem like the hardest thing in the world to do.  For those of us listening, it might be uncomfortable, or maybe we don’t know what to say.  But there comes a point where we have to try.  Where we have to push past the discomfort and raise our voice, even if we are scared shitless.  Where we have to listen as our closest friends tell us about the darkest times in their lives.  Where we have to hold perpetrators accountable in a world where our justice system often doesn’t.

I would like to see a community here in Asheville where we as survivors support each other in all steps of healing.   Where we push each other to be vulnerable, or strong.   To shout, or make art, or destroy something, or write, or cry.  I know that personally, my journey through the bullshit left in my head from the 9 years of my abuse will probably never be totally over.  I need people to be mad with.  I need people to be totally broken and crazy with.  I need people who have seen the same darkness and are still alive and fighting back, despite how hard it is.

I am looking for a network of people, survivors and allies, to engage in active healing together.  Not only in healing, but also in the strengthening of our own voices, and the desire to work toward public speech and activism in a variety of ways.

I am asking for your stories as a starting point.   By beginning to tell our stories to each other, we begin to break down the walls of silence that have held so many of us in for so long.  These can be totally anonymous or not, and can be in whatever form feels right for you- a poem, a narrative, a page from your journal, a drawing, whatever.   You can post them on this blog, or in a comment, or in an email, or on the side of a building, or whispered to a friend.  Also, if and when you post your story, please indicate if you are ok with it being published in a zine in the future.  Thanks for your courage.  It is a fucking scary journey, but you are not alone.